Guys: When you’re at the gym, do you make an effort to be respectful and helpful to women?
I don’t mean to question a “leading” question or suggest what your answer should be, but over the years all my buddies and I have always made an effort to be respectful and helpful to women at the gym. And pretty much all the guys I talk to say the same thing. We don’t ogle, leer, stare, gawk, harass, intimidate, hit-on, etc. We’d never do that. We’re just do our workout and go home, and we don’t mind sharing the equipment with them at all. A lot of women complain about men at the gym, but I reckon the complaints may be exaggerated, perhaps because some women feel self-conscious and therefore wrongly assume we’re all looking at them or judging them when really we’re not. All my buddies and I are pleased to see women improving their health by exercising, and we couldn’t care less how her hair, clothes, body, makeup, etc. looks because we’re all there to get sweaty anyway.
I reckon the vast majority of men are polite and respectful at the gym, but so many women seem to reckon we’re all a bunch of sexual predators. I just feel like us guys are getting an unfair, terrible rap because of a few dishonorable knuckleheads with terrible manners. Do you guys feel the same way?
GUYS: I’m not asking if you look. I’m asking if you look in a rude or disrespectful way.
Ok… poor choice of word. People are getting hung up on the word “helpful”. Let me rephrase the question:
GUYS: WHEN YOU’RE AT THE GYM, DO YOU MAKE AN EFFORT TO BE RESPECTFUL TO WOMEN?
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Tags: bad manners, bad rap, body makeup, buddies, clothes, effort, Guys, health, helpful, knuckleheads, leading question, majority of men, ogle, poor choice, respectful, sexual predators, women, workout, you're
im sorry, but when i see a gorgeous woman in spandex…….i am going to look. and im going to look A LOT.
if they dont like it, they can join an all women’s gym.
I certainly look
i do not go to gyms, so that is not a problem
I have to say that this is one of the most honest and thought-provoking comments I’ve seen on this forum in a long time. Nice job.
I don’t need to make any special effort to be respectful because I’m not going there to insult or spit at women (or anyone, for that matter). Besides, how “helpful” could I be with them? I just get inside, say excellent day, work with the machines, take a shower, say excellent bye and out.
I haven’t been in a gym for a while, but when I did go to one I didn’t leer at or otherwise bother any of the women. I just minded my own business. I wasn’t there to talk to people. I was there to work out.
I don’t really know what you mean by being “helpful.”
im a woman and i have to say that
…. even though i ve been hit on at the gym … i never had anyone be disrespectful towards me there or anywhere else for that matter.
- i personally believe that if u respect urself others will respect u as well…
and well theres always the self-fufilling phropecy …a psych term that means … if u belive and obses over the fact that (something specific/ neg) is going to happen to u, u act in a way that makes others react the in the way u initially didnt want.
“”"do you make an effort to be respectful and helpful to women?”"”
No, why should I? Me and the majority of men are there to work out, we’re not there to disrespect or insult women; if those women feel that way then they either have some issue or a victim mentality. It’s their problem, not men.
No more or less so than I would in any other mixed environment.
oh i just like the backasswards sexism here.
why would you need to ‘help” any woman at the gym? maybe her tiny girl arms cant manage the weights? maybe she doesn’t know all the complex equipment?
please.
shawn gets a thumbs up. women don’t want to be “helped” or treated differently just because we’re THERE. seriously, it’s a gym. everyone should just mind their own darn buisness.
and i’m SO glad you don’t mind sharing the equipment with us ladies. i guess you are just SO very liberated and moden.
this is probably the brand of sexism that irritates me most. the covert-ops, “we’re just so pleased for women” brand. you really need to get your head screwed on straight.
I’ll be helpful to anyone who looks like they may need help. I go to a community gym built by the local hospital, and that includes a lot of elderly visitors who may need a hand with weights.
As for helping women, sure, I help them if they’re moving weights or need a spot or whatever, but only after asking permission.
And I do the exact same for guys.
As for the looking thing, I may notice, but I also endeavor to get some mastery over my own eyes. They aren’t pieces of meat, they’re people and they’re just trying to get i na workout, same as me.
Of course. They are trying to work out just like me. I don’t know about you, but I feel kind of sweaty and smelly after a excellent workout, so I don’t particularly feel attractive with sweat running down my nose.
I’m sure women feel the same way. I let them have their space.
I go to the gym to work out. That’s it. That’s what most guys do. The men who ogle women at the gym are a very rare bunch, despite all the things you read on here which makes us all sound like we want to rape the women in the gym. I do my own thing and figure the women at the gym will do their own thing too.
On another note, I’ve seen a couple of women looking at me for more than a tenth of a second at the gym. It never occured to me they may be predators of some sort.
For the most part I mind my own Business. Most of the time it seems like the ladies are checking out the dudes.. There complaints are probably just a cover…
It doesn’t require effort to be respectful
I just go about my business and let everyone else go about their’s and to me that is respect enough
I am mostly too busy sweating it out. I look at “people” whatever sex they may be. I see if they are doing something different or differently. That’s it. But to be honest, it is one of those places where I need to concentrate. I don’t socialize much there, I even skip my buddy batch. And it is one of the last places I would try to be respectful. No time, man!
I make an effort not to notice them, or at least be subtle. I’ve a home gym now anyway.
I reckon that both men and women can view the gym as a valid place to meet someone. I’d imagine that people are checking each other out equally.
I’d say their discomfort is caused by as you said, “knuckleheads” and by themselves, projecting their own insecurities and fears. The physical strength on show might be intimidating to them.
No, I treat the women no better than the men, except I do look if I feel like it.